The Simplicity of Masturbation

Yesterday I baked an okay sweet potato cake with ground almonds, coconut flour and eggs...and sweet potatoes.  I should have used honey instead of molasses and I went a bit overboard on the cinnamon.  Next time I'll add walnuts and dates and buckwheat flour.  Maybe I'll pitch in some yeast and let it rise. 

I went for a jog.  I took an aerial class and I wrote.  At the end of the night, after too much time in front of a computer screen, I stretched a little and knocked over a lamp.  Then I did something wonderful, something I haven't done in a very long time. 

I masturbated.  I was a little nervous at first because it takes a long time for me to get off when I'm manual.  Give me a vibrator and it's a snap...or a buzz.

Due to a recent breakup, my friend is staying with me and sleeps in the same bed.  I wasn't sure when she would be home, but I knew it was probable that her arrival would coincide perfectly with the moment of orgasm, which (as I mentioned), requires energetic and emotional commitment.  I went for it anyway. 

I had made a relaxing self pleasure mix on my musical device.  Thom Yorke happened to be serenading me at the moment when my toes began to curl in and my legs tightened. 

I was correct in my prediction.  She meandered into the room as I lie on my back, making tiny circles with the pointer and middle finger of my right hand, pulling tight the skin around my clitoris with my left.  I don't think she knew what I was doing - I had been keeping this a quiet event - but, of course, I can't be sure.

I pulled hands away from my private parts and took a few deep breaths as she rummaged, the way people do when they get home late at night. 

Lucky for me she walked back into the kitchen, leaving me alone with my hands and feet and inner thighs and Bjork's warbling voice, suggesting Possibly Maybe I might still cum.

I returned gently to the pleasure center, feeling hot prickles rush up my neck and cheeks.  The circles became faster and that wonderful moment arrived - the one just before release.  I imagine this occurs with all forms of matter in that timeless instant when solid transforms to liquid, liquid to gas.  This is when desperation melts, when all things brain oriented evaporate and I surrender to another state.   

Back arched, eyes crossed (this is speculative), nipples erect as I moaned softly.  It seemed as though tiny feet were running up and down my body.  Oh I love myself, oh thank you (whoever you are) for making kinetic the pleasure potential in this body. 

When my friend entered seconds later and crawled in bed, I was smiling inside.  She took off her clothes and I couldn't help but consider the possibility for a moment.  The chance to remind her how lovely this feels.  Do you know what our bodies can do?  I wanted to share it, but the simplicity of masturbation is what makes it so lovely and easy (even with the time commitment). 

Instead I hugged myself and took off my headphones.  The brief fantasy was enough.  I rolled over, enjoying now the static hum of an air purifier and the doppler waves of passing cars.  I snuggled in to the adventures of my subconscious.